Your heart sings a unique melody in the world, one that was conceived of and created by the divine and holy presence of God. Your very essence is divine, and yet as you walk upon the spiritual path to enter more fully into a direct knowing and experience of God's love, you may become aware of all the parts of yourself that do not trust God.
It may seem strange to experience one part of you that feels longing, devotion, and love for God, and another part of you that is terrified to let go and place your life more fully in God's hands. This experience is actually quite common, and is a part of spiritual development that has to do with the higher self or soul becoming more integrated with your human, embodied self.
Most of humanity has lived in a state of separation from God for a very long time, and so our society and even our bodies are attuned more to the practical and physically embodied aspects of life. The deeper miracles and mysteries that underlie our very existence and the creation of our world, do not register in our awareness, so we do not perceive the divine love and light that forms an integral part of each moment of each day.
How then do we develop a greater trust in God, and put to rest our fears, doubts, and the "What if's" that emerge when we attempt to give over more of our lives to divine will? It is one thing to want to have more faith in God, and it is quite another to live this kind of trust in a daily way. It is in the arena of our daily lives that we fully develop the capacity to trust God.
When we enter spiritual life in a conscious way, our spirit opens a doorway to the divine that was previously dormant. New capacities and abilities emerge, and a new level of intuitive perception awakens. At the same time, our entrance into the higher vibrational realms of light also activates the process of purification which cleanses the soul and spirit from all that has previously held us back from a full realization of our divine nature.
When purification begins, God's light illuminates what was previously hidden in consciousness. The events of our lives, the circumstances of our relationships, and the quality of our emotional life begins to change. As we go through this process, we are returned to our soul's original Oneness with the divine. Each part of ourselves that has carried fear, mistrust, anger, hurt or resentment, is given new light and new light. The old pain surfaces to our consciousness and is released, and we are gradually freed of the emotional encumbrances that prevented us from trusting god.
The process of purification does not happen overnight, but rather evolves through time and unfolds in such a way that all our previous separations become healed. No longer is spiritual life separate from "real" life, no longer is God relegated to part time status in our daily life. No longer do we run from our feelings and hide our true heart's desire.
We gradually become free of so many or the burdens we have carried. Our spirit is renewed and new directions, new possibilities and new hope arise. No longer do we carry fear that God will abandon us, for we realize from within the depths of our being that God's love holds us always, and that we are the love that we seek. Such are the blessings that come from living a life consecrated to God's love, blessings that enlighten and heal the self, and radiate outward to bless the Earth and all of humanity.